On Cyrus’s third visit to Orkideh, they discuss grief and art and the meaning of death. She says to Cyrus, “What I mean is, I think maybe you’ll find your real ending once you stop looking for it” (182). What do you think Orkideh is trying to tell Cyrus, in the context of the discussion they were having? Cyrus opens up a little more but feels guilty about burdening the artist with his own pain. With so much talk on the internet (and in real life) about emotional labor and what you should and shouldn’t expect from the people around you, what did you think of Orkideh’s response? What do we owe each other?
Cyrus is so focused on his "mission to live a meaningful life" that he's missing chances to find that meaning in his day-to-day existence. Orkideh knows from experience that meaning isn't found in "grand gestures". Rather, it's in every day connection
The last part of Orkideh's response is "I think real endings tend to work their way in from the outside." I found her words to be both deliberately cryptic, like the oracle comment that she references a moment before, as well as being simple and straighforward. She seemed to be silently screaming at Cyrus, “Stop this obsession with death. Go live!" and "Give life more time and you’ll understand.”
In fact she does say: “Just let yourself get a little older and you’ll understand.” She’s doing all she can to implore him to stick around on earth a bit longer, until he gets more accustomed to it. Because don’t we all get a little more comfortable here with age?
As for what we owe each other, I think we owe it to our loved ones to share the big truths, the things we’ve come to understand as certainties, the codes we’ve cracked. To help each other continue to put one foot in front of the other, armed with the new knowledge we’ve picked along the way. That's what the two of them seem to be doing here. She's on the brink of death and his life has been indelibly overshadowed by it, and that gives them both a generosity with each other, a willingness to be free and open.
We are rarely so generous and unguarded with our deepest thoughts, so this conversation feels surreal in its rawness. Their emotion is tangible and resonates through all the senses. When I close my eyes after reading it, I can see the scene play out. I’d love to see it performed, onscreen, onstage, or even in an audio book. There is a richness on the page that would be thrilling for actors to tap into.
I think there's a difference between being emotionally available to someone in conversation, and expecting someone else's emotional labor. While he feels guilty about everything, the fact that he takes a moment to consider how much to divulge indicates he cares about this. This may be a turning point for Cyrus becoming less selfish in considering the balance.
Stop anticipating. Allow for other possibilities. We owe each other the space and grace to not assume, to not project our own interpretations of what they need or don’t need. We owe one another confidence of their agency.
Everything in this book made my cry—in a good way. I even eventually forgave Orkideh. Her scenes with Cyrus were wise; she'd learned a lot in her life, just as he was starting to "get" stuff. But I found her selfish (maybe not the exact right word) in a way Cyrus was not. I was very proud of Cyrus for rising above, even when he really didn't feel like it, even when it would have just been easier to just let his addictions kill him.
Looking back at this scene from having read the whole book, I can see how the writer was setting the reader up for the big twist. Orkideh was trying so hard to give Cyrus life advise he wasn’t quite ready to receive. It reminded me of times when I attempted to shield my growing children from life’s ‘slings and arrows’ when it was up to them to learn how to dodge them themselves. And how they tripped over themselves to not appear vulnerable.
Cyrus is so focused on his "mission to live a meaningful life" that he's missing chances to find that meaning in his day-to-day existence. Orkideh knows from experience that meaning isn't found in "grand gestures". Rather, it's in every day connection
The last part of Orkideh's response is "I think real endings tend to work their way in from the outside." I found her words to be both deliberately cryptic, like the oracle comment that she references a moment before, as well as being simple and straighforward. She seemed to be silently screaming at Cyrus, “Stop this obsession with death. Go live!" and "Give life more time and you’ll understand.”
In fact she does say: “Just let yourself get a little older and you’ll understand.” She’s doing all she can to implore him to stick around on earth a bit longer, until he gets more accustomed to it. Because don’t we all get a little more comfortable here with age?
As for what we owe each other, I think we owe it to our loved ones to share the big truths, the things we’ve come to understand as certainties, the codes we’ve cracked. To help each other continue to put one foot in front of the other, armed with the new knowledge we’ve picked along the way. That's what the two of them seem to be doing here. She's on the brink of death and his life has been indelibly overshadowed by it, and that gives them both a generosity with each other, a willingness to be free and open.
We are rarely so generous and unguarded with our deepest thoughts, so this conversation feels surreal in its rawness. Their emotion is tangible and resonates through all the senses. When I close my eyes after reading it, I can see the scene play out. I’d love to see it performed, onscreen, onstage, or even in an audio book. There is a richness on the page that would be thrilling for actors to tap into.
I think there's a difference between being emotionally available to someone in conversation, and expecting someone else's emotional labor. While he feels guilty about everything, the fact that he takes a moment to consider how much to divulge indicates he cares about this. This may be a turning point for Cyrus becoming less selfish in considering the balance.
Stop anticipating. Allow for other possibilities. We owe each other the space and grace to not assume, to not project our own interpretations of what they need or don’t need. We owe one another confidence of their agency.
It seems that audio isn’t working. As a visually impaired person that means I can’t “read” your posts 😔
Everything in this book made my cry—in a good way. I even eventually forgave Orkideh. Her scenes with Cyrus were wise; she'd learned a lot in her life, just as he was starting to "get" stuff. But I found her selfish (maybe not the exact right word) in a way Cyrus was not. I was very proud of Cyrus for rising above, even when he really didn't feel like it, even when it would have just been easier to just let his addictions kill him.
Looking back at this scene from having read the whole book, I can see how the writer was setting the reader up for the big twist. Orkideh was trying so hard to give Cyrus life advise he wasn’t quite ready to receive. It reminded me of times when I attempted to shield my growing children from life’s ‘slings and arrows’ when it was up to them to learn how to dodge them themselves. And how they tripped over themselves to not appear vulnerable.
I’m still waiting for my turn to get the book from the library. Hope to catch up soon.
Fantastic