Re the election, just a lot of uncertainty at work right now — I’m a federal employee in one of the targeted agencies. Feels very frantic since everyone is trying to get a lot done before Inauguration Day.
But overall, my general feeling with it is “god damn it, white people, really?”
I’m ready to try something different. As someone who came from a low-income/working class background but catapulted into the highly educated knowledge economy liberal category for all of my adult life so far (I’m 45), I have myself been growing ever more disenchanted with what I feel is a lack of curiosity, a lack of humility, and a lack of humanity among the people who surround me in my political and professional bubbles. My vote is one that Harris could take for granted and that was not going to change, but I want folks I know to open up to at least hearing that even some of us who would never ever vote for Donald Trump have real criticisms of not just the DNC/Party but of our fellow Democrats and how they are engaging in politics. So many complex, contested issues and ideas that are just not even discussable, so much elitism, so much reducing other humans to flat “kinds of people” and symbols of “systems”. No real, serious policy ideas that meet the huge changes that have happened with tech and the economy and climate. In my opinion, as just one lifelong Democrat (who has no plans to change that), I think we can go more (much more) progressive on policy and create a larger tent again but only if we start de-centering the highly educated liberals on the internet. Also, curses on the godforsaken digital information ecosystem.
You're absolutely right that the Democrats need to listen to a broader, more diverse range of voices and I agree about going more progressive. I will never understand why the Dems feel like they have to embrace the center-right and right. Like... Liz Cheney? REALLY?
Yup. A friend of mine had an interesting take--by moving more centrist, it gave the Rethuglican party more room to move waaaaaaaaaaaaaay right. At this point I want the dems to clone Bernie so we can have a younger Bernie. Also if the Orange Menace starts ANY noise about a 3rd term, we push back and get Obama back.
Also, I should say, the Harris campaign clearly did try to tack away from the idea that they were the party captured by the educated elite, but there was no real substance behind it. Given how our info ecosystem works I don’t think what her campaign did was ever going to counter the power of what every day people see and hear from the “democrats” online and in real life anyway. We have way more power than we think as individuals and how we show up politically, imo.
I am a poll worker in Detroit. By the time I got home, I had a bad feeling (I’ve never seen a Republican POTUS candidate get so many votes in my precinct -- 25 votes or almost 10% of in person) I watched no election coverage that night. I found that I cannot listen to any analysis that does not begin and end with sexism and racism. Far worse than I dared to hope. I usually have NPR on all the time. I don’t now. Over the weekend, I moved into what I called “Fansville USA” so I could watch the Wolverines and the Lions. And College Gameday. I am trying to work through my rage at men (and really look at the gender gap for every demographic) so I can enjoy the company of the Harris voting men in my life. I’m reading books -- Demon Copperhead, it’s so long but so good
Your newsletter brings me joy, too. Also, happy to count myself among the 88% of Jewish women who understood the assignment. I'm an old creative writing student at NYU right now and appalled at the lackadaisical attitude coming from my classmates who use Chat bots. I'm convinced (most) kids don't go to school to learn any more; they're just there to figure out the fastest way to make money.
Mark Morford (former columnist for The SF Chronicle) came out of his self-imposed Yoga exile to send us a newsletter with some helpful ways to fight back. One was join the ACLU, which I did. Another was to buy print copies of banned kids books to stock libraries when the time comes, which I'm planning to do. As I said to a friend this weekend, we have sit Shiva, now it's time to fight. Thank you for all you do.
I am in south central PA. Just walking my dog and seeing all the Trump signs in yards is so depressing and frightening. I was astonished that it was completely quiet here on Election Day and the following day. People in PA love their fireworks and literally set them off for any occasion, and yet it was silent. Which I was grateful for.
I am truly disgusted to learn that so many registered Democrats just didn’t come out to vote. Smh. And white women really failed us. How do we un-brainwash white female Republicans?
Finally, I also abruptly (with lots of planning and no notice to him) moved myself and my three kids out of my boyfriend’s house about three weeks ago. He had become negative, angry, and controlling constantly, daily. After a year of this, and him trying to step in and harshly parent my kids, I gave up trying and left. I am living and working amid boxes. I now work a full time job plus two freelance steady jobs, over 50 hours a week, and will still be barely making those ends meet. I am exhausted. I am emotionally wrung out. I am scared of losing any benefits I am trying to secure—food stamps and health insurance for my kids, whose father lost his job and their insurance and we lost child support last month—in the coming months. I am afraid for my safety and my 14 year old daughter’s safety. My anxiety builds throughout the day, every day.
My kids, my extended family, decorating for the holidays, knitting and reading are bringing me some relief. And this newsletter. For sure. Thank you!
I also find knitting helps me. I think it is the repetition. My mother left my dad with three young kids because of physical and emotional abuse. You are doing an amazing thing for your children. I wish you the best.
Thank you so much!! I already divorced a narcissist (their bio dad) years ago. Then I’m with my bf for over a decade, we move in together, and he’s a whole different person! And off we go again. Sigh. I don’t think I will be dating again. And I definitely won’t be living with a another man for the rest of my life!!! Ugh.
Exhausted. Sad. Totally uninterested in sorting through the ashes of how Democrats shoulda/woulda/coulda. Joys: Made a pumpkin pie from scratch (I mean using a real sugar pumpkin) and put it in an (also homemade) graham cracker crust. Such good comfort food. Re-reading mystery books. Avoiding all media for a while. Except for you, of course and a handful of others, who I know will make me feel better.
Thank you as always for everything you post for us . It probably seems simple but I’m finding joy in baking and eating with my kids , and decorating for Christmas early. I lost my mom in June and am facing a divorce with three kids and a currently non existent writing “salary” so I’ve gotten pretty good at squeezing joy from the small things . Plus my lesbian flannel loving cookie eating early decorating self really bothers my neighbor with his hand painted Trump signs, so I do delight in that in a small way too. I hope everyone can find their small moments of comfort .
Thank you for that important Dissent article. I know everything written is true and yet I still voted for Harris. And I will continue to dissent. I’m cooking more. Getting together with my cousin who lives nearby now. Writing my own substack. Wondering as I stare across canyons how to show up better for my Hillcrest SD community. For my multiracial family. For my broken country. Thank you for all that you do.
The Dissent article gave me a lot to think about. But I also voted for Harris with open eyes. She was the only choice this time around and while I agree with many of the points in the Dissent article, I don't think he gave her any credit for the things she did well. She was given a nearly impossible task thanks to Joe Biden and I have no doubt that she was being very poorly advised to not differentiate herself from him given his unpopularity. Hubris, all around.
Feeling a lot of dread. Three neighbors and I were just discussing this morning the realization that the guy who lives upstairs voted for Trump. “I felt a certain fondness for him, but now I’ll never see him the same way,” said my neighbor.
American hatred is laid bare. Well, even more bare. Feeling disgusted and angry.
Also feeling worried in my own small way. What if they take away my Social Security and Medicare? I mean, I just GOT them, for frick’s sake.
RE the election....as a White GenX Jewish woman, all I can say is I'm sorry and yes I voted for Kamala. My local bar has a lot of blue collar types who are CONVINCED that the Orange Anus will magically make prices go down. Also had one genius "explain" to me that "NVIDIA has a huge market cap because they're getting all the government contracts to make cell phones for illegals." That is a verbatim quote alas. I explained to them that I am a computer geedk and an avid gamer (and former tech support so help me Goddess) and can confirm that NVIDIA is booming because of gaming and cryptocurrency, and that they f***ing don't even make chips for phones and hasn't for quite some time. The funny thing is that this same individual is always asking me to fix the remote control for the bar TVs. Guess lil' ol' me who doesn't know anything about tech isn't qualified to do that anymore, and maybe the Big Stwong Conspiwacy Feowist can use his Superior Very Highly Intelligent brain to fix it himself (although I will miss my free shot each time I un*** one of their TVs because nobody there knows how to change the input after a powerdown). Nobody at that bar except me that night also had no idea how tariffs work. More than one guy there also thinks that women "always" know when they get pregnant "and start to show at 5 weeks." Man, did the other gals at the bar correct him on that one.
On a more serious note, I have a family member (not blood) who is a very well to do White woman who, yep, you guessed it, chose the Orange Turd. They live in a very nice suburb of NY and have a housekeeper and a gardener who are both here illegally from Central America -- married couple. Said family member said to me "Y'know (X and Y) were saying how they can't afford eggs anymore, and I've talked with other people from (country X and Y are from) and they're all saying the same thing." Two things: 1) Hell would freeze over before this person spoke to ANYONE casually in a social setting, nevermind the work crews that her landscaper brings in from Home Depot and 2) She treats X and Y like pets almost and brags about getting them medical care when they couldn't afford it. It goes without saying that she benefitted extensively from contraception and abortion rights also. She has family in some of the more batshit red states, and those family members (including a recently married couple trying for kids) seem totally unbothered by the prospect of literally having their spouse die from a pregnancy-related emergency. Her family is swimming in money and truly give no fucks and think that they can buy their way out of fascism if it ever even shows up at THEIR doors.
Am I a horrible person for saying that I'm glad Mom passed a few years ago so she doesn't have to see this shit? Mom was a groundbreaker -- one of the first women to do a grad degree at an Ivy ever, Jewish, grew up poor, and one of the smartest women I ever knew. She almost bled out after miscarrying when I was 2 years old because the Catholic doctor on ER duty didn't want to do a DNC initially. Another doctor did a half assed job and she basically had a slow bleed for months afterwards. 2 marriages but at least her 2nd hubs didn't treat her like an idiot. I want to leave her in peace but I swear, if there was a way to conjure her back as a Vengeful Spirit, I would be very tempted....
PS I still go to that local because there are actually smart and interesting people there to talk to also, including 2 very nice dykey gals who also help run the bar pool league. Also if I didn't drink at this point I'd either go batshit or to jail or both.
I feel much less low than I did post the 2016 election, largely because unlike in 2016, very few people were scoffing at the likelihood of a second cheesy Mussolini presidency. People are taking this seriously and most of my trans, queer and Black friends are as unsurprised as I am, albeit still laid low and feeling terrible. But we have each other, as we always did. And we have amazing teachers and guides and activism now is so much better than activism when I was in my twenties because rest seems to be integrated into it. I wish all Black women rest. Go nap. Eat good food. Enjoy time spent with loved ones.
I live in Brooklyn, NY. My little area has always been Trumpland. But the results of the election stunned me. I really thought we had the momentum against this criminal. I grew up on the tabloids and always knew who he was. But the collective amnesia and voting against your own interests really threw me. I spoke to women in my life who talked about how much they disliked her. The internalized misogyny and racism threw me. I stopped reading or watching the news until I’m in a better place about it.
I’m reading novels and watching K-dramas. It’s soothing. And working out the rage. Literally. Walking and lifting weights.
I’m gutted. I’m so disappointed at my white brothers and sisters…especially women. My job and my husband’s jobs are probably gone. We are both teachers. What’s giving me joy is getting out into nature. I spent some time hiking by the ocean yesterday and that helped a little bit.
Re the election, just a lot of uncertainty at work right now — I’m a federal employee in one of the targeted agencies. Feels very frantic since everyone is trying to get a lot done before Inauguration Day.
But overall, my general feeling with it is “god damn it, white people, really?”
Thanks for this.
I’m ready to try something different. As someone who came from a low-income/working class background but catapulted into the highly educated knowledge economy liberal category for all of my adult life so far (I’m 45), I have myself been growing ever more disenchanted with what I feel is a lack of curiosity, a lack of humility, and a lack of humanity among the people who surround me in my political and professional bubbles. My vote is one that Harris could take for granted and that was not going to change, but I want folks I know to open up to at least hearing that even some of us who would never ever vote for Donald Trump have real criticisms of not just the DNC/Party but of our fellow Democrats and how they are engaging in politics. So many complex, contested issues and ideas that are just not even discussable, so much elitism, so much reducing other humans to flat “kinds of people” and symbols of “systems”. No real, serious policy ideas that meet the huge changes that have happened with tech and the economy and climate. In my opinion, as just one lifelong Democrat (who has no plans to change that), I think we can go more (much more) progressive on policy and create a larger tent again but only if we start de-centering the highly educated liberals on the internet. Also, curses on the godforsaken digital information ecosystem.
Those are my feelings.
You're absolutely right that the Democrats need to listen to a broader, more diverse range of voices and I agree about going more progressive. I will never understand why the Dems feel like they have to embrace the center-right and right. Like... Liz Cheney? REALLY?
Yup. A friend of mine had an interesting take--by moving more centrist, it gave the Rethuglican party more room to move waaaaaaaaaaaaaay right. At this point I want the dems to clone Bernie so we can have a younger Bernie. Also if the Orange Menace starts ANY noise about a 3rd term, we push back and get Obama back.
Also, I should say, the Harris campaign clearly did try to tack away from the idea that they were the party captured by the educated elite, but there was no real substance behind it. Given how our info ecosystem works I don’t think what her campaign did was ever going to counter the power of what every day people see and hear from the “democrats” online and in real life anyway. We have way more power than we think as individuals and how we show up politically, imo.
I am a poll worker in Detroit. By the time I got home, I had a bad feeling (I’ve never seen a Republican POTUS candidate get so many votes in my precinct -- 25 votes or almost 10% of in person) I watched no election coverage that night. I found that I cannot listen to any analysis that does not begin and end with sexism and racism. Far worse than I dared to hope. I usually have NPR on all the time. I don’t now. Over the weekend, I moved into what I called “Fansville USA” so I could watch the Wolverines and the Lions. And College Gameday. I am trying to work through my rage at men (and really look at the gender gap for every demographic) so I can enjoy the company of the Harris voting men in my life. I’m reading books -- Demon Copperhead, it’s so long but so good
I used to live in Detroit! Was there recently and my friend in West Village was like “I’m surprised to see any Trump signs around here…yikes.”
Well you can tell her that Precinct 134, which is most of West Village and Islandview, has 25 people who voted on Election Day for DJT
Thank you for that work. Demon Copperhead is one of the best novels I've ever read. And I've read a lot of books!
Your newsletter brings me joy, too. Also, happy to count myself among the 88% of Jewish women who understood the assignment. I'm an old creative writing student at NYU right now and appalled at the lackadaisical attitude coming from my classmates who use Chat bots. I'm convinced (most) kids don't go to school to learn any more; they're just there to figure out the fastest way to make money.
Mark Morford (former columnist for The SF Chronicle) came out of his self-imposed Yoga exile to send us a newsletter with some helpful ways to fight back. One was join the ACLU, which I did. Another was to buy print copies of banned kids books to stock libraries when the time comes, which I'm planning to do. As I said to a friend this weekend, we have sit Shiva, now it's time to fight. Thank you for all you do.
I am in south central PA. Just walking my dog and seeing all the Trump signs in yards is so depressing and frightening. I was astonished that it was completely quiet here on Election Day and the following day. People in PA love their fireworks and literally set them off for any occasion, and yet it was silent. Which I was grateful for.
I am truly disgusted to learn that so many registered Democrats just didn’t come out to vote. Smh. And white women really failed us. How do we un-brainwash white female Republicans?
Finally, I also abruptly (with lots of planning and no notice to him) moved myself and my three kids out of my boyfriend’s house about three weeks ago. He had become negative, angry, and controlling constantly, daily. After a year of this, and him trying to step in and harshly parent my kids, I gave up trying and left. I am living and working amid boxes. I now work a full time job plus two freelance steady jobs, over 50 hours a week, and will still be barely making those ends meet. I am exhausted. I am emotionally wrung out. I am scared of losing any benefits I am trying to secure—food stamps and health insurance for my kids, whose father lost his job and their insurance and we lost child support last month—in the coming months. I am afraid for my safety and my 14 year old daughter’s safety. My anxiety builds throughout the day, every day.
My kids, my extended family, decorating for the holidays, knitting and reading are bringing me some relief. And this newsletter. For sure. Thank you!
I also find knitting helps me. I think it is the repetition. My mother left my dad with three young kids because of physical and emotional abuse. You are doing an amazing thing for your children. I wish you the best.
Thank you so much!! I already divorced a narcissist (their bio dad) years ago. Then I’m with my bf for over a decade, we move in together, and he’s a whole different person! And off we go again. Sigh. I don’t think I will be dating again. And I definitely won’t be living with a another man for the rest of my life!!! Ugh.
Your newsletter brings me joy. 💗
Thank you for subscribing and reading! I appreciate it.
Exhausted. Sad. Totally uninterested in sorting through the ashes of how Democrats shoulda/woulda/coulda. Joys: Made a pumpkin pie from scratch (I mean using a real sugar pumpkin) and put it in an (also homemade) graham cracker crust. Such good comfort food. Re-reading mystery books. Avoiding all media for a while. Except for you, of course and a handful of others, who I know will make me feel better.
Thank you as always for everything you post for us . It probably seems simple but I’m finding joy in baking and eating with my kids , and decorating for Christmas early. I lost my mom in June and am facing a divorce with three kids and a currently non existent writing “salary” so I’ve gotten pretty good at squeezing joy from the small things . Plus my lesbian flannel loving cookie eating early decorating self really bothers my neighbor with his hand painted Trump signs, so I do delight in that in a small way too. I hope everyone can find their small moments of comfort .
Sometimes the simple things bring the most joy.
Thank you for that important Dissent article. I know everything written is true and yet I still voted for Harris. And I will continue to dissent. I’m cooking more. Getting together with my cousin who lives nearby now. Writing my own substack. Wondering as I stare across canyons how to show up better for my Hillcrest SD community. For my multiracial family. For my broken country. Thank you for all that you do.
The Dissent article gave me a lot to think about. But I also voted for Harris with open eyes. She was the only choice this time around and while I agree with many of the points in the Dissent article, I don't think he gave her any credit for the things she did well. She was given a nearly impossible task thanks to Joe Biden and I have no doubt that she was being very poorly advised to not differentiate herself from him given his unpopularity. Hubris, all around.
Yes. I agree.
Hello, dear mind. And thank you. So the link to the "conservative couple who found out their son was gay" is not included. It's in the Times, correct? But I found it here: https://www.cnn.com/2024/11/03/us/conservative-christian-coming-out-gay-cec/index.html
Oh thank you for pointing this out. I will fix it and yes that is the correct story. It was on CNN.
Feeling a lot of dread. Three neighbors and I were just discussing this morning the realization that the guy who lives upstairs voted for Trump. “I felt a certain fondness for him, but now I’ll never see him the same way,” said my neighbor.
American hatred is laid bare. Well, even more bare. Feeling disgusted and angry.
Also feeling worried in my own small way. What if they take away my Social Security and Medicare? I mean, I just GOT them, for frick’s sake.
Reading about the Mattel mix up brought me some laughter. Thanks for sharing that article!
RE the election....as a White GenX Jewish woman, all I can say is I'm sorry and yes I voted for Kamala. My local bar has a lot of blue collar types who are CONVINCED that the Orange Anus will magically make prices go down. Also had one genius "explain" to me that "NVIDIA has a huge market cap because they're getting all the government contracts to make cell phones for illegals." That is a verbatim quote alas. I explained to them that I am a computer geedk and an avid gamer (and former tech support so help me Goddess) and can confirm that NVIDIA is booming because of gaming and cryptocurrency, and that they f***ing don't even make chips for phones and hasn't for quite some time. The funny thing is that this same individual is always asking me to fix the remote control for the bar TVs. Guess lil' ol' me who doesn't know anything about tech isn't qualified to do that anymore, and maybe the Big Stwong Conspiwacy Feowist can use his Superior Very Highly Intelligent brain to fix it himself (although I will miss my free shot each time I un*** one of their TVs because nobody there knows how to change the input after a powerdown). Nobody at that bar except me that night also had no idea how tariffs work. More than one guy there also thinks that women "always" know when they get pregnant "and start to show at 5 weeks." Man, did the other gals at the bar correct him on that one.
On a more serious note, I have a family member (not blood) who is a very well to do White woman who, yep, you guessed it, chose the Orange Turd. They live in a very nice suburb of NY and have a housekeeper and a gardener who are both here illegally from Central America -- married couple. Said family member said to me "Y'know (X and Y) were saying how they can't afford eggs anymore, and I've talked with other people from (country X and Y are from) and they're all saying the same thing." Two things: 1) Hell would freeze over before this person spoke to ANYONE casually in a social setting, nevermind the work crews that her landscaper brings in from Home Depot and 2) She treats X and Y like pets almost and brags about getting them medical care when they couldn't afford it. It goes without saying that she benefitted extensively from contraception and abortion rights also. She has family in some of the more batshit red states, and those family members (including a recently married couple trying for kids) seem totally unbothered by the prospect of literally having their spouse die from a pregnancy-related emergency. Her family is swimming in money and truly give no fucks and think that they can buy their way out of fascism if it ever even shows up at THEIR doors.
Am I a horrible person for saying that I'm glad Mom passed a few years ago so she doesn't have to see this shit? Mom was a groundbreaker -- one of the first women to do a grad degree at an Ivy ever, Jewish, grew up poor, and one of the smartest women I ever knew. She almost bled out after miscarrying when I was 2 years old because the Catholic doctor on ER duty didn't want to do a DNC initially. Another doctor did a half assed job and she basically had a slow bleed for months afterwards. 2 marriages but at least her 2nd hubs didn't treat her like an idiot. I want to leave her in peace but I swear, if there was a way to conjure her back as a Vengeful Spirit, I would be very tempted....
PS I still go to that local because there are actually smart and interesting people there to talk to also, including 2 very nice dykey gals who also help run the bar pool league. Also if I didn't drink at this point I'd either go batshit or to jail or both.
I feel much less low than I did post the 2016 election, largely because unlike in 2016, very few people were scoffing at the likelihood of a second cheesy Mussolini presidency. People are taking this seriously and most of my trans, queer and Black friends are as unsurprised as I am, albeit still laid low and feeling terrible. But we have each other, as we always did. And we have amazing teachers and guides and activism now is so much better than activism when I was in my twenties because rest seems to be integrated into it. I wish all Black women rest. Go nap. Eat good food. Enjoy time spent with loved ones.
I live in Brooklyn, NY. My little area has always been Trumpland. But the results of the election stunned me. I really thought we had the momentum against this criminal. I grew up on the tabloids and always knew who he was. But the collective amnesia and voting against your own interests really threw me. I spoke to women in my life who talked about how much they disliked her. The internalized misogyny and racism threw me. I stopped reading or watching the news until I’m in a better place about it.
I’m reading novels and watching K-dramas. It’s soothing. And working out the rage. Literally. Walking and lifting weights.
I’m gutted. I’m so disappointed at my white brothers and sisters…especially women. My job and my husband’s jobs are probably gone. We are both teachers. What’s giving me joy is getting out into nature. I spent some time hiking by the ocean yesterday and that helped a little bit.